10 Things Guys Think Within 5 Minutes of Meeting You

1. Why is she talking like that?

There are three types of voices: low voices, high voices, and "I'm going to try and be cute by purposefully talking in a high pitched baby voice." Sometimes this is cute; sometimes it just gives us a headache.

2. Why is she smiling at me?

Everyone is a sucker for a nice smile, but guys really pay attention to how you smile at them. Are you smiling politely, or are you giving them a sidelong glance across the room? Have you totally stopped caring and broken into a genuine giant grin because of something funny the guy said? The last one is the most rewarding.

3. What is she wearing?

Either it's "Why did she walk outside like that?" or "Holy crap, I am so glad she walked outside like that."

4. She's got a great sense of humor.

Your sense of humor is like your child. Everyone's is different but you think yours is the one everyone else's should measure up to. If a woman doesn't seem to respond to our jokes, we'll probably never be friends.

5. What is she looking at?

We'll follow your eyes around the room and take note of what you're paying attention to. Maybe you're watching a game on the TV bar or you're looking at the exit because you want to leave. Either way, we just learned a lot.

6. Can she tell I'm checking her out?

Of course we're going to sneak a look at you. Even the most genuine, charming, down-to-earth guys are going to think about having sex with you in the first five minutes.

7. What is that scent?

If you're wearing a strong perfume, guys are going to spend most of that initial conversation trying to guess what that scent is. "Vanilla? Cinnamon? Sandalwood? I have no idea what sandalwood smells like so it has to be sandalwood."

8. She's being super nice to that waiter.

The way you treat other people can reveal a lot about you quickly. Are you making the bartender go back three separate times to mix your drink properly, or are you being super nice to someone who just bumped into you? It's the quick, gut-check passing interactions that reveal a lot.

9. She won't stop touching me.

This can be a really good thing or incredibly annoying. It's flattering when someone can't keep their hands off of you, but it's obnoxious when you're constantly poking at us.

10. Your makeup.

Men are going to judge you based on your makeup. Some men are going to find smoky eyes sexy, some are going to find them trashy. None of them are going to appreciate just how long it took you to do that cat-eye.