- Take clothes off and leave them in a pile on the floor.
- Walk naked to the bathroom.
- Look in the mirror, sucking in your gut and comment on how studly you are.
- Get in the shower. No need to look for a washcloth. You never use one anyway.
- Wash your armpits, then your face.
- Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
- Wash your private parts. Make sure to leave hairs on the soap.
- Shampoo your hair. Make a shampoo mohawk. Pull back the shower curtain and check yourself out in the mirror.
- Pee in the shower.
- Partially dry off. Flex your muscles in the mirror.
- Return to the bedroom with the towel around your waist.
- Throw wet towel on the bed. Take two minutes to get dressed.